In 2021, I was sitting in a hospital bed in San Francisco, California waiting to go into facial feminization surgery.
I remember thinking to myself
I sure hope I prepared my body adequately for the surgeon for the afternoon.
This was the moment that changed my life forever.
For those of you who don’t know – I am an avid alpine ice climber.
A large portion of doing any high-resk extreme sport like ice climbing is an ability to achieve a zen like state I call the ultimate focus.
Being able to detach your mind from your body and trust in your mind’s ability to govern your body despite it’s raw instinct is a critical skill to master.
The surgeon looked me in the eyes and said
Well it would be weird if you weren’t… a little… nervous…
Of course, I was nervous. However – I also am a master of controlling my anxiety and my nerves in frightening situations.
I believe the surgeon was a bit startled at how calm I was during the entire ordeal.
I was so skilled at detaching my mind from my body – that I had taken it as far as considering what would or wouldn’t be polite to deliver to a surgeon for the afternoon.
The thought of having my skull split open and being kept alive for several hours by plastic tubes barely concerned me.
It was then that I realized that I had been detaching my inner self from my body my entire life.
I was truly reckless because my body was a nuisance at best. An ugly and broken vehicle for me to travel through this universe.
The amount of relentless work, energy, and effort required to fix my body was almost impossible to achieve simply because my body itself was the thing that was limiting my potential.
I casually strolled into the operating room and high-fived my surgeon on the way in.
I closed my eyes and relinquished control of my body for the last time. I knew when I awoke my body was never going to limit my potential ever again.
I promised myself from that moment forward – that I would do everything in my power to see to it that no other determined transgender person would ever be limited by their body again.
A mind truly is a terrible thing to waste, and our blatant lack of transgender support that was busy wasting minds was about to meet it’s opponent.
Read more about Kris Nóva.